I always knew. Like 80% sure. He was never really a boy's boy. A dad just knows. He was acting all secretive and quiet for the past few days and mentioned he wanted to talk to me when he was ready.

He told me he and his friend did stuff (he and a friend had oral sex) and he knows that he is gay and being gay is who he is and he can't change that.

I said "so all you are telling me is that you are gay?"

He said yes.

I told him I couldn't care less, meaning that his sexuality doesn't change how I feel towards him. Like if he woke up with brown eyes instead of blue. I also don't want to be that gay dudes dad. I want to be Ethan's dad. I don't him to be that gay dude. I want him to be Ethan.

He took it as I didn't care about him and was hurt. I can't explain to a 14yo that his sexuality should be unimportant in his identity. It's not fun being gay in a straight world where you're either treated as a pet or a freak. His sexuality is like 3% of who he is. I don't think he's mature enough to understand that and all he sees are assholes throwing coming out parties or being bullied and it doesn't have to be that way. That's why I had such a minimum reaction.